Grilles And Tailgates For The Legally Blind

By | February 13, 2015

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The 2015 Detroit Auto Show was full of exciting, groundbreaking, and generally epic new rides.  For truck lovers, 2015 was an especially good year.  The next generation Toyota Tacoma, the 2017 Ford Raptor, and the entry of a new diesel by way of the Nissan Titan XD.  Ram brought a new trim level to the 1500 with the Ram Rebel, because they didn’t have enough oddball trim options in the 1970′s.  I’ve always liked Dodge trucks, I’ve had several, but I think there were more trim options of the Dodge D and W series trucks than there were episodes of The Brady Bunch.  Warlocks, Little Red Express’s, Top Hand’s, and my personal favorite, the Power Wagon.  The list goes on and on.

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The 2017 Ford Raptor and the Ram Rebel really caught my attention.  Not because they are anything extra special but because you’d have to be legally blind to miss them.  I’m still stewing over how this happened but both the Ram Rebel and Ford Raptor have massive letters on their tailgates and grilles.  Perhaps it’s one design team playing the other.  I can just see the Ford guys laughing over their morning coffee.  “Let’s slap ridicoulously large letters on the tailgate of our latest concept and see who copies us!”  The Ram on the Rebel’s front grille is acceptable but the Ford’s letters are almost as big as the headlights themselves.  You certainly won’t question what cleans your clock when you j-walk in front of next gen Raptor.

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Jeremy Clarkson has made a living out of making fun of automobiles, especially American ones.  They hate our cheesy pin stripes and over the top styling.  This new crop of trucks take the cake.  You could be legally blind and still read the text on the back of these two trucks from a mile away.  The worst part is, the trend is already making its way to the tip trim levels of the Ram.  That Laramie’s will be plastered with the giant Ram text while the grilles will receive gaping nostrils, creating what looks like an X.  Maybe Ram will be the official vehicle of  “X-Men, Day’s of trim gone bad”.

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Whoever came up with these fabulous trim additions will likely go down in history with the greats who designed the likes of the AMC Gremlin, Lincoln Blackwood, and Chevy SSR.  I think I might start my own business and specialize in shaving emblems.  The market is looking good.


1 Comment

Chad Waite on February 13, 2015 at 9:25 am.

Soon the entire truck will be chrome color and the name will be in black. We call that the Justin Bieber trim: http://dailyderbi.com/musical-idol-to-pure-douche-justin-bieber-chromes-out-his-fisker-karma/

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